Love Cup 3

So, did you make some time to play this past week? I know I did! Please remember that this series is about relationships. We are presently exploring a relationship with ourselves before we can be available to relate outside of ourselves. The idea of a filled Love Cup is quintessential to loving others and accepting love from others. If you don’t know how to fill your own Love Cup, you really won’t know how to receive love from someone else. In that case you will constantly be hungry for love while it’s right in from of you.

Have you ever heard someone say: “I’m so hungry, I could eat a cow?!” Though not a very attractive expression to vegetarians, most English speakers understand the meaning of this expression. When we are very hungry, we really don’t care what it is, if it is edible and meets our basic diet requirements we’ll consume it voraciously. An individual with an empty Love Cup feels like that most of the time.

Even if your Love Cup is somewhat balanced, once in a while you will have this dire need to be hugged or have someone tell you that you are wonderful. You might just want a word of encouragement after going through a rough period in your life. All these examples can become the Love Cup trap I’m talking about. That’s when you are emotionally depleted for one reason or another and you need a boost because your cup is temporarily or permanently low. You are then vulnerable and you need to be careful.

If you are single, please remember that there are people who prey on empty or depleted Love Cups. If you are married or in a relationship, and you cannot articulate your Love Cup needs or they are not met, you can become an emotional danger to yourself and to those closest to you. Yes, you can become very needy. If you find yourself being very needy that’s a sure sign that your Love Cup needs are not being met. You are caught in the Love Cup trap. It’s usually a dangerous time of life when you feel so empty that almost any type of loving attention would do.

As a single person, you need to walk away from needy individuals who want to have a relationship with you. These individuals will deplete your Love Cup and will still require more. If you are the needy one I am talking about, get some therapeutic help or find some good books so you can learn how to fill your own Love Cup. If you are married to a Love Cup drainer, get help immediately. If you don’t you may be setting yourself up for depression and depleted faith.

So how do we avoid such a trap? For one thing, you and I need to have at least one secure source of unconditional love in our lives. Having that source is the first step. We must be willing to allow our cup to be filled by that source. Second, you and I must have at least one person that we love unconditionally. Love is a two way street, if you just get it and don’t give it, you will be out of balance and caught in the Love Cup trap. You were designed to love and to be loved. When neither is happening your emotions are imbalanced and out of control.

So many people you know do not have a source of unconditional love. So the question to you is, who loves you unconditionally? Who do you love unconditionally? If you are a believer, I accept it as a given that you know that God loves you unconditionally. However, I am talking about that human connection of unconditional acceptance. If all we needed to survive was God’s love then he wouldn’t have given us human love.

Your action step for this next week is to come up with a list of people who love you unconditionally and a list of people you love unconditionally. Next week, we will explore how to get and how to give unconditional love. In the mean time, please remember that you are as loving as you think you are.

There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear. 1 John 4:18

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